Friday, December 26, 2008

Ms.Click just loves to make out with me

I'm so bummed about my major flaw on my online poker game, and that is misclicks, yup I kept experiencing misclicks. I was the chip leader of a 4000 MTT and 200 people left, I mistakenly called an all in bet my another player who's chip is almost as big as mine and I lost it, he had KK and I had J4 offsuit, darn.

Then it happened again I was playing PLO and I didn't mean to call the bet of the other player and that cost me $40, that is what I can only remember, it just happens a lot to me, I dont know what to do. I only remember one time I won a misclick, I had 25 offsuit and the other guy had Aces, he flopped an Ace for his trips but I rivered him with my wheel straight, I won $27 there.

Hey guys, how do you limit your misclicks?

Wednesday, December 24, 2008

Sexy Time with my FPP's

So I'm looking at my 4000 fpp's and I'm thinking how I'm going to convert this to money, dinero,or benjamins. I looked at Pokerstar site and saw that if I have 25,000 fpp's I can sell it for $285 but I'm 21,000 short, so I went looking for fpp satellites that I can join in and saw this 210 fpp satellite to the Guiness world record tournament, 20 people gets to play, top six gets the seat and you can unregister if you want.

I joined this satellite over and over until I accumulated 176 T$ and my fpp's are gone, now the next task is to use this tournament money and turn them into cash and the best way possible that I saw was the "Double or Nothing" tourneys, 10 people battle it out to the first 5 spots and the other 5 gets nothing. I joined this tourney over and over until finally it's over, my 4,000 fpp's are now $155, woooohoooo.

Merry Christmas everybody.

Wednesday, December 17, 2008

And the Donkey actually wins!!!!

So I had the day off last Monday and decided to play a $2.20 shootout at Pokerstars, almost a 1000 players, being the donkey I am I really didn't expect anything, you have this feeling like, "whatever I'm ready to lose", I know the attitude is wrong but I have not won anything since Al gore invented the internet.

but for some reason I kept eliminating one player after another and the next thing I know I'm headsup with this guy for the whole thing, he has a massive chip lead and he kept putting me all in until I got tired of it and called with Ace rag. And that was the turning point, I won 3 more coin flips, the game was over and I'm $319 richer, woooohooo.

Anyway, I checked my stat online(nick=kobenator) and I'm a whopping 72% ROI, I dont know what that means but it feels good, I know what you're thinking, it's only $319, but for me it's big, I have won thousands of dollars playing live Limit Holdem but that's back when Limit hold em was still alive.

Merry Christmas everybody and it's coming from my heart and hope you have a better year in 2009.

Sunday, December 14, 2008

Indecent Proposal(Warning:Contains Explicit Language)

Me and my girlfriend arrived at Mccarran Airport and we met this wealthy guy, he offered to share his limousine on our way to our hotel and we said ok and we thought that's the end of it.

So while we were gambling at the Bellagio, we saw him again playing at the high limit area, so we watched him a bit and he was winning, not sure how much but after that we went drinking at the bar and he asked this question to both of us.

"Suppose... I were to offer you 250 gran for one night with your girlfriend.", my mind is saying", "heck yeahh you can have this beeyotch" but I answered "nope, she is very special". surprisingly my girfriend said, "I'll do it but no anal". when the wealthy guy heard the word anal, he seem disgusted and dissappointed, he then blurted, "I'm just kidding", and I countered by saying, "I know you were, ha ha ha", then he paid the bill and left us alone. I looked at my girlfriend and I wanted to say, " Way to negotiate dummmy" but I kept quite, she looked at me with that look, "sorry, I would have given you 50 gran from that loot" but she did not say a word. We didn't talk the whole night and went to our room and slept.

On the way home while I'm driving from the airport, I decided to break the ice and talk to her again, "I'm thinking we should try an@l tonight" and she smiled and answered, "only if you have half a million dollars", I felt insulted but just smiled back. When I arrived at her house, I lost it and yelled at her, "Get the heIl out of my car, I dont want to see you again, efffing amateur", she was stunned, she grabbed her stuff and slammed the door, that's when I woke up, it was all just a dream. My girlfriend woke up too and I was gonna ask for anal sex but decided to just settle for an old fashion banging.

Wednesday, December 10, 2008

Christmas Bad Beat!!!

LAst night I was on a holiday spirit and put out christmas decorations on our front porch inclucing an $80 Christmas lantern, but when I woke up this morning the lantern was gone, I was devastated, I know the economy is bad but come on steal a freakin lantern, wtf.

Anyway, that incident ruined my day, I went online and played at my favorite site Pokerstars and just talked smack with everybody, I irritated the short stackers by calling them fungus that feeds on pond scum. I also made fun of open limpers on the button when nobody has actually limp in before them, I mean why do it, why not raise it, even miniraise it, steal the damn blinds, that is the right thing to do.

So now that I'm calmed down, I woulld like everybody to have a good Christmas, even if you just lost your job and short on dough, just try to have a good Christmas, spread the goodwill to everyone. Merry Chrismas everybody.

Online Poker

I have registered to play in the PokerStars World Blogger Championship of Online Poker!

The WBCOOP is an online Poker tournament open to all Bloggers.

Registration code:
document.write(paramCode)
565773

Sunday, December 7, 2008

Ellix Powers is back!!!!!

I went to Hollywood park casino and there he was the man the legend Ellix Powers, did not bother him, I know for sure it was him but not 100% sure. I know this is a very long time ago but he likes talking trash when he's playing and he irritated a lot of people especially James "Mr. Best Seller" Mcmanus.

Anyway, while playing $4/$8 LHE I overheard that Ellix almost won a tournament on the same casino couple of months ago, and I said that's great, the man is back. So after winning a measly 12 bucks, I decided to call it a night and went home. I checked online and he indeed won 6 gran, not bad, I wonder how loud the table is during that tournament, they should have video tape that event or somebody please make a documentary about him.

Another African American that I like is Mike Carroll, he placed 27th on last WSOP ME, he is also as talkative and confident like my boy Ellix, in fact he can be the next Ellix.

Last night my boy Manny PAcquaio won against Oscar dela Hoya, it was a lopsided fight if you can call it a fight, they should not do this type of events anymore, they are not even close on weight categories. Anyway, Oscar should retire now and continue to wear ladies lingerie.

Here's the ESPN video of the infamous Ellix vs James,http://www.pokersavvy.com/poker-videos/ellix-powers-has-the-whole-table-tilted

Online Poker

I have registered to play in the PokerStars World Blogger Championship of Online Poker!

This PokerStars tournament is a No Limit Texas Hold’em event exclusive to Bloggers.

Registration code:
document.write(paramCode)
565773

Friday, November 28, 2008

Black Friday

So I woke up early today, I need a lot of shirts and pants and this is the best day to purchase these stuff so I thought. I went to a local KOHL'S department store, I was able to park ok, and initially did not see a lot of people in the store.

I picked a total of 9 items, went to the fitting room, then went straight to the cashier area but what do you know the line is now very long, I was, wtf, where in the hell did these people came from, so ok I fall in line and noticed that several people are prepared for this scenario, one guy brought in 3 books and he started reading and the lady in front me took her ipod out and started listening to music while seeping hot coffee.

I was just, wow these people are smart, I could have done the same thing, I guess they do this annually. If the store have wi-fi, I could have brought my laptop and could have played poker while waiting.

Anyway, after waiting for 15 minutes I noticed that the line is not even moving so I computed pot odds(money I'm going to save if I buy these items) and all my outs(time I'm going to spend) and I concluded that it's -EV to continue.

So I started heading out of the store, threw all the stuff I picked on an empty shelf and yelled, "The hell with this line", one guy from way behind answered, "Shut the hell up", I said to my self, "No he didn't", I answered back, "you come down and make me", but nobody seems coming, "Whew", luckily he folded and did not call my bluff, I quietly took down the small imaginary pot and left hastily.

When I got out, the parking lot is so full that it took me a couple minutes to find my car, Where is that car?. Speaking of where, one guy from another forum wants to know where my buddy Chuck is, another forumer said to type, "Where is Chuck Norris?" on google and yall should get the answer.

Click this link for more Chuck Norris videos,http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NdD54rG9oQA

Wednesday, November 26, 2008

Funny Live Poker Names

We all have names, most are common and some are unique, some are dull and some are funny. I was watching a couple of NBA games and saw this guy who's name is Chris willcocks, I thought that was kind a funny. Then there is this Matt Boner of the Spurs. I wonder what would be the conversation on the opposing locker, could be like this.....

Coach:Hey you got Boner tonight.
Player:No I dont Coach, I dont feel it.
Coach:I'm talking about you guarding MAtt Boner tonight.
Player:Ahh ok I thought you noticed my wood.

There's plenty of Funny live Poker names, when David Benyamine and DAniel Negraneau was rumored to be busto, they called them David "No more" Benjamins and Daniel Negranoutofmoney, then there's MAria Ho, "Hey she's my Ho".

Some other names like Christian HArder, Sam Fartha, Jimmy Freaky and Cuban poker player names are kind a funny too.

Speaking of Cuba, five suspected terrorists was released from Guantanamo Bay US military prison, here's the link, http://www.topix.com/us/2008/11/judge-orders-release-of-five-guantanamo-bay-inmates.

But one suspected terrorist was not so lucky, he was sentenced to face Chuck Norris so his lawyers appealed and luckily his sentenced was reduced to death.

Well that's it for now, I will put more poker related stuff on my next blog, I like to give a shoutout to all my homies at pokermanila.com, thanks to Mr.chokol8ce, Mr.Throws, Mr.Krunch and Ms.Esposa for shipping me money on my stars account. You know what if my blog made you smile then send me some dinero, cents or dollars is appreciated, my Pokerstars id is "kobenator", thanks.

Tuesday, November 18, 2008

World Poker Tour Babe

"If you think I'm sexy, common baby let me know", so the words from Rod Stewart's song.

Well there is this WPT Babe that I'm attracted to, no I'm not talking about Shana Hiatt or Mike Sexton, I'm talking about Ms.Linda Johnson.

There are three things that I look at when I'm watching her.

First is her dress, I like seeing Linda wearing low cut dresses that would reveal her cleavage, I get so excited when I see her giant melons.

Second is when she remove her eyeglasses and insert the temple part into her mouth, wow, just wow.

And lastly is when she again open her mouth and say's, "Shuffle up and deal", that's when I just cant control my self anymore, I just want to have sexy time with her, you know what I mean.

Speaking of WPT, yall know that you'll hear a lot of WPT when you're near Chuck Norris, coz that's the sound of his kick, punch and falling bodies. Wak, Pak & Tak

Below is her picture, enjoy,
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Linda_Johnson

Well that's it for now, I will put more poker related stuff on my next blog, I like to give a shoutout to all my homies at pokermanila.com, thanks to Mr.chokol8ce, Mr.Throws, Mr.Krunch and Ms.Esposa for shipping me money on my stars account. You know what if my blog made you smile then send me some dinero, cents or dollars is appreciated, my Pokerstars id is "kobenator", thanks.

Monday, November 17, 2008

More important than Poker

I had to take a half day off work today, I went to Sylmar this morning to look for my Aunt who were affected by the fires. My Grandpa texted me from the Philippines saying to look for my Aunt in Sylmar Highschool and to check for there condition. Coming from a broken family I'm not that close to my Father's side of the family but seeing the devastation on TV I was compelled to drive down there.

Before I went there I cooked some porridge and put it on a big crock pot, it was hell getting to that area not only because of the traffic but some parts of the area you can't get into because the police considered the area a crime scene, apparently somebody set this fire intentionally. So when I got there, I brought the copy of the picture of my Aunt that I got from Friendster and start looking at the people. I saw my Aunt and she was so happy to see me, she gave me a hug and told me that her house is not burnt but they are not allowing them to go back at the moment.

She introduced me to her husband and 3 young kids, she said that Red Cross has been feeding them cold cut sandwiches and they seem satisfied. I told them that I cooked some porridge for the kids, My aunt helped me carry the porridge and when I opened the lid the aroma spread to the whole gym and immediately there are other people who wanted to partake. So I hurried up and gave my Aunt's kids plastic bowl and gave them bowl of porridge, I looked on to my Aunt and she gave me the look that they're ok and its ok to give away the remaining porridge. I explained to the other people that I didn't bring much and that the food would be beneficial to the children and they complied, there must have been at least 12 kids that went running and I gave them food until its all empty, I also gave a bowl to an elderly woman who said that she's a having a hard time chewing food, one parent cried thanking me.

I talked to my Aunt for almost an eternity, we exchanged call numbers and gave her the remaining supplies I bought for them. when I left the area, I saw a lot of people with worried look and most of them seem tired of crying, reminded me of my past when I could not afford anything, I still dont have much but I'm sure I'm better that some of these people who lost their houses on this fire. While I'm driving home there, I noticed that I could not stop crying.

I know yall accustomed to seeing funny anectdotes from me but today I wont, let's just pray for these people and more strength for the Firefighters who's putting there life on the line to put these fires out.

Friday, November 14, 2008

Women in Poker

I was playing NL online last night with two female poker players, they were talking about life in general, then suddenly the other other lady shared that she is breast feeding while playing. I was cool with that but not this kid who said, "Yuck, that's disgusting, we didn't need to know that". these two female players became Angry Vaginas alternately berating the kid until the poor kid left, I just kept quite which is unusual, I normally like to take part on these kind of situations.

Lots of good female poker players, Did you that Barbara Enright is the first female poker player who've reach the final table of the WSOP ME? Jennifer Tilly is not bad either, tiffany Michelle is the latest success story, she finished 17th on the last WSOP ME. KAthy Liebert is also an excellent poker player but many believes she's not a woman, apparently she's hanged like a horse.

Vagina plays a big part in mainstream poker, you see Vaginas during the money presentation, Vaginas also interviews poker players, a certain Vagina named Phillida HEllmuth also said that she can dodge bullet, baby.

Speaking of babies, Did yall know that not only did Chuck Norris punched his way out of his mother's womb, he also reached out for the scissor and cut his own umbilical cord?, now you know.

Wednesday, November 12, 2008

STRAIGHT FLUSH BABY!!!!

Last Sunday, I went to my future in-laws house to pay my respect and to asked for their daughter's hand, they reluctantly said ok, they would have preferred my gf's ex who is a Doctor.

I helped out in preparing the food, met all my gf's family including Brusko, my gf's older brother who is gay. Let me tell you about Filipino gay guys, most prefer straight guys unlike here in the US where most gay guys settle with fellow gay guys.

So I was carrying this big plate of food and here comes Brusko smiling at me and said, "Hmmm, yummmy and I'm not talking about the food" then looked down to my genetalia area. I was stunned but I'm thinking he's just kidding, so I said, "wtf, I'm going to be your brother in law, why are you messing with me?", and he answered, "well, yall not married yet, I have more money and....my mouth is wider" and he left me laughing hysterically".

I was a bit offended but did not show it much like my attitude when I get bluffed on a pot but I'm steaming inside.. And he's right, I'm mainly marrying his sister for money and house, Brusko kind a ruined my day so I left early without my gf.

While driving my thoughts are about my incoming marriage and of course poker, so I exited Carson blvd and head down to Hawaiian gardens Casino.

I got seated on a $4/$8 LHE half kill pot game(it goes to $6/$12 when somebody wins twice in a row), after 30 minutes, I got involved on a kill pot, UTG, UTG+1 & MP all limped, so I limped too with my 3h4h, Button raised, SB 3 bet, I know this guy is very loose, that's why it was no surprised that everybody called him.

Flop was, 2h,6h,As
lots of betting and it got capped, 2 guys folded and 4 people saw the turn.

Turn, Jd,
SB bet, MP folded, I called and button raised and we both called.

River, 5h, filling up my straight flush
so board is 2h,6h,As,Jd,5h,

OMG, I cant believe this but I kept my composure, SB bet which he does all the time to get info, I raised him and Button 3 bets, SB disgustingly folded, We both re-raised one another until all my chips are in, he showed his AhKh and I happily showed my STRAIGHT FLUSH BABY. The pot is easily $500, I was so happy that I bought everybody a drink.

On the way home, I was thinking how my family would look like, doing a lot of chores like bringing my kid to school, attending parent meetings etc. Speaking of school, according to Chuck Norris's high school Pricipal, Chuck is the only one who can leave before the bell rings, one time a Teacher tried to stop chuck from leaving early, so Chuck gave him detention and made him write this lines , "I must not stop Chuck from leaving whenever he wants", the poor teacher did this for 5 hrs straight.

Friday, November 7, 2008

Poker Engagement

Well last night I hurried home so I can watch the Houston Rockets/Yao Ming(he's so sexy), so I grabbed the remote and there's a jewelry ring taped on it, and as soon as I removed the tape, my girlfriend came out of no where and went down on her knees and said, "Will you marry me?"

I paused for a moment and said yes, but my poker conscience has a question, so I said, "But please let me play poker while we're married ok?", and she said yes too, so its like we both proposed to one another, how weird is that.

Anyway, she's loaded and I see the word bankroll on her forehead, I mentioned that to her and she responded with, "really, funny coz I also see a word on your forehead and its D-O-N-K-E-Y".

So now that I'm engaged, we were thinking that we should emulate this dance for our wedding reception, this is from the movie SAturday Night Fever, see below link, what yall think?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2ZCtgFmQvjQ

I tried to contact my buddy Chuck Norris to advise him of this important stage in my life but he's not in a good mood, he just got back from an L.A. Court, somebody accused Chuck of "ATTEMPTED MURDER" but the case got thrown out and the Judge explained that Chuck never "ATTEMPTS", if the guy is still alive then its not Chuck who did it, case closed.

Well that's it for now, I will put more poker related stuff on my next blog, I like to give a shoutout to all my homies at pokermanila.com, thanks to Mr.chokol8ce, Mr.Throws, Mr.Krunch and Ms.Esposa for shipping me money on my stars account. You know what if my blog made you smile then send me some dinero, cents or dollars is appreciated, my Pokerstars id is "kobenator", thanks.

Wednesday, November 5, 2008

Las Vegas Cutbacks

As yall know the economy is not doing good so there are massive layoffs and cutbacks in Las Vegas and these are some of the cutbacks we heard.

-at the MGM, they fired all the Lion feeders and will instead just use some of their poker dealers to feed these Lions, goodluck with that.

-at the Hilton, they have a hired a Barry Manilow look alike to take over the show, apparently Barry is too expensive, so they hired another gay guy and his name is Clay Aiken.

-at the Bellagio, to save money on the water shows, they connected all sewers to the fountain so they can use customer's urine and spit for the water show, so yall better change your clothes if you get wet from this show.

-at the Excalibur, PaiGow dealers are being asked to help prepare the nightly buffet especially when Louie Anderson and Jimmy Fricke is in the house.

-Las VEgas Whore companies will no longer hire illegals to distribute porn ads, they will instead use some of their aging or least attractive aka fugly prostitutes to give out these ads.

-Stations casinos have replace their cleaning staff with dogs, apparently these dogs can lick the rooms clean.

-The Mayor also laid off the whole police force and replace them with Delta Force aka Chuck "mothafaka" Norris.

-and lastly, no more of this dam tours.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0U0G9OT_yq4

Well that's it for now, I will put more poker related stuff on my next blog, I like to give a shoutout to all my homies at pokermanila.com, thanks to Mr.chokol8ce, Mr.Throws, Mr.KRunch and Ms.Esposa for shipping me money on my stars account. You know what if my blog made you smile then send me some dinero, cents or dollars is appreciated, it's good for you and me, my Pokerstars id is "kobenator", thanks.

Saturday, November 1, 2008

Almost won a no-look Sit n Go

Yesterday morning I got bored and decided to mimic what Annette Obrestad did, I put a tape on my monitor so I wont have to see my hands.

Here are the guidelines that I followed playing this $6.50 no look 6 man sit n go.
1.Fold to any raise, no matter how big and what position.
2.Only play on LP and miniraise if no limpers.
3.Limp when somebody else limps.
4.Always bet when it get checks to me and check to the river if I get called and fold to any bet.

So I did all of this and got lucky to get to a headsup situation and I just kept going all in and he must have folded a shitload of hands before he got tired and called me with T8 suited and he deservingly won, it was fun and yall should try it too.

After the game I looked at the hand history of this no look sit n go and I actually folded a lot of good hands from EP and from raises. I missed playing two AK, one Pocket Kings, one Pocket Tens and one AQs.

For all yall fellow Chuck Norris fans, For all yall fellow Chuck Norris fans, I'm sad to inform that they will not be putting his face on Mount Rushmore, the granite rocks are not strong enough to hold Chuck's beard.

Thursday, October 30, 2008

Devil's Advocate

The other day I was browsing other poker forums and saw how Joe Sebok apologized for making a crucial mistake during the tournament, everybody was quick to tell him that he don't need to apologize and it was one of those things he needs to do.

Well I decided to play the devil's advocate and posted something like this, "Well Joe Sebok is just reenforcing what we already know about him, he chokes and let his ego control his game during the end part of tournaments, he plays excellent in the begginning then ruin everything by playing stupid hands when it matters. The guy does not know how to finish".

OMG, lots of Sebok asskissers replied with things like I'm disrespectful and I should be ban and so on and so forth. Isn't the purpose of a forum is to share you opinions and ideas?, Why are people so quick to jump on you when you see things differently?.

What kind of name is Joe Sebok anyway, its not cool like a Barry Greenstein or a Chuck Norris is. anyway let me give yall more lame jokes. Joe Sebok aka the Donkey walks in a bar and the bartender says why the long face. Where does a donkey belong, in a mule-seum. Oh btw, there is a movie called Devil's Advocate and Charlize Theron is naked on it.

Anyway I was reading the bible and saw this entry, "On the seventh day, chuck Norris said, I'll take it from here", Wow, I learn something everyday.

Saturday, October 25, 2008

300 Topless Men

Went to Arena Sports Grill and Bar at the Commerce casino last night, downed a couple of rum and coke and walked to the Poker room. While waiting for an open seat at the $4/$8 LHE, they've announced a new table for $40 NL and they need players, so I grabbed a seat on that table.

First hand, folded to me at MP, got pocket 6's, I raised the pot 3X the blinds, cutoff went all-in, button went all in too, SB folded but BB went all in too, I know I'm getting the odds but I still have 17BB so I folded. They opened their cards, cutoff has AK offsuit, button has Pocket 5's(wow), and BB has A9 offsuit(wtf).

Board turned out to be, (J,J,7,2,T), so Pocket 5's grabbed the $115 pot, I could've won without flopping a set. That kind a tilted me a bit, after a couple of rounds I got Pocket Ten's and went all in with my remaining 10X blinds after 2 limpers, BB called me with Q9 suited, he spiked a Queen on the turn and I reloaded.

This $40 NL is an all in fest, it can be fun but not the game for grinders, you can not win regularly on this game.

So I went home break even after I delivered my own bad beats, I cracked Pocket Kings and rivered a gutshot on somebody, I walked in the house and my relatives are watching this Spartan movie "300", I enjoy watching this movie not only because of topless nice abs men but the visual effects are stunning.

There is actually a rumor of another Spartan movie and my main man Chuck Norris will star on it and I believe the title of the movie is "1".

Here's preview of what you're going to see on that new Spartan movie,
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Sm215HDfQ1E

Thursday, October 23, 2008

Baby Don't Hurt Me

The other night I was watching my collector's DVD copy of "Night at the Roxbury" which stars Will Ferrell and Chris Kattan, I can't believe it's been 10 yrs since this movie came out, such a classic.

Anyway, I was playing online No limit while I'm watching this movie, I picked up pocket Kings UTG, I raised 3X blinds, button/Villain called and blinds folded.

heads up to the flop, 6c,2c,2h
I bet the pot, Villain instacalled

turn was Jd,
I went all in with my remaining $65 which is about $15 more than the pot.

Villain paused for a moment which is a good sign so I started singing "What is Love" but as soon as I hit "Baby dont hurt me" he pulled the trigger and called.

River is a freakin Ah

So board is 6c,2c,2h,Jd, Ah

Villain got AdQd and I was devastated, I cant believe he called, He does not have any pair or draw on the flop and the turn.

But as usual I'm taking it like a man, like a real man Chuck Norris, my main man, he is such a feared poker player that he called Phil Hellmuth idiot 5 times coz the brat folded his Pocket Aces couple of times when he saw Chuck limped in.

Anyway, Happy 10 yrs anniversary for all Night at the Roxbury fans, here's the link of the movie trailer and the lyrics.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fnao6GtZyik


(What is Love)

CHORUS:
What is loveBaby don't hurt me
Don't hurt me no more Baby don't hurt me
Don't hurt me no more
What is love Yeah Oh I don't know
why you're not fair
I give you my lovebut you don't care
So what is right and what is wrong
gimme a sign
(chorus x2)
uoh oh...Oh I don't know
what can I do what else can I say
it's up to youI know we're one
just me and youI can't go on
(chorus x2)
uoh oh..What is love What is love
What is love Baby don't hurt me
Don't hurt me no more
Don't hurt me Don't hurt me
I want no other No other love
This is your life our time
When we are together
I need you foreverIs it love
(chorus x2)
uoh oh..
(chorus x2)
Baby don't hurt me
Don't hurt me no more Baby don't hurt me
Don't hurt me no more Baby don't hurt me
Don't hurt me no more Baby don't hurt me
Don't hurt me no morewhat is love?!...

Thursday, October 16, 2008

Poker Gossip Around The World

Europe:Dario Minieri and his boyfriend Isabelle Mercier was spotted arguing who should be on top when they're doing sexy time. Annette Obrestad finally admitting that she likes to devour eggrolls.

Middle East:Mark Seif is taking some experimental medicine for his fart disease, yall know he farts every 17 seconds.

Asia:Chinese peeps are disowning David Chiu coz they found out he's a fake. During an interview in China, a Chinese reporter accidentally steps on David's foot and David reacted by yelling in english, "Mothafucka watch where you going fool".

USA:Phil Hellmuth's wife Kathy caught Phil and Greg Raymer doing sexy time at their Bellagio's suite, when Kathy was interviewed by the local news crew, she was furious and had this to say, "I dont know what that fat dude has that I dont have".

Well I'm pissed again today, I was planning to go to Pechanga this weekend to play 8/16 LHE but my Boss told me that I have to work this weekend but I'm taking it like a man, like a real man Chuck Norris, my main man, he such a bad azz that he can get Allen Cunningham to come out of the closet, Chuck knows he's gay but Chuck is busy with his infomercials, see below, I just can't get enough of Chuck, he's too sexy for his shirt.

Well that's it for now, I will put more poker related stuff on my next blog, I like to give a shoutout to all my homies at pokermanila.com, thanks to Mr.chokol8ce, Mr.Throws and other peeps for shipping me money on my stars account. You know what if my blog made you smile then send me some dinero, cents or dollars is appreciated, it's good for you and me, my Pokerstars id is "kobenator", thanks.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Kcz0MLLizeY&feature=related

Sunday, October 12, 2008

Sweet Caroline

Last night I went to my friend's birthday party and there's the usual too much food, there were 2 big Lechon(roasted pigs) and at least 50 type of food dishes(eggroll,pancit noodle,grilled meat etc), you can smell the yummy aroma while driving on a nearby freeway.

This is how Filipinos celebrate, we always over prepared the food and when you leave we want you to bring some more food home which is kind a cool unless you are on a strict diet.

Around 8pm, they started the Karaoke, this old guy sang "My Way" with so much power, he was good but I'm sick of this song, but this song has become part of Filipino karaoke tradition.

Anyway, there is this white guy who I know can't sing but was force to stand up in front of everybody, his Filipina wife shoved him the mic, feeling embarassed, he quickly pretended to select a song. I decided to save him so I stood up and look for that song that average Americans know how to sing.

And there it was, my personal favorite too, "Sweet Caroline" by the living legend Neil Diamond, I grabbed the other mic and sang with him, and you know what, it brought the house down. As soon as we hit the chorus, everybody stood up and sang with us, it was great, it felt like hitting a one outer on the river.

Then around 10 pm we set up the madjong table and right away ten people were itching to sit. I wanted to play but gave way to the much older crowd and decided to just play backgammon with this whiz kid, he look smart and the kind of kid that does not speak a lot but when he does you would not believe it was coming from a 14 yr old kid. He talked about how it's going to take a decade for the economy to come back and the government is not willing to accept this reality, I just sat there in awe and he almost beat me playing backgammon.

I went home around 2 am, woke up after a couple of hours with a severe hangover but I'm taking it like a man, like a real man Chuck Norris, my main man. Chuck is such a feared guy that when he plays at Fulltilt he is not a Red Pro but the only Gold Pro and his nickname is a three letter word and in case you are wondering what it is, you guessed it right. Chuck Norris is "GOD" at Fulltilt.

Anyway here's a link of Neil Diamond's Sweet Caroline, enjoy,
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=heKgZ6qP4S8

Thursday, October 9, 2008

Your Kiss Is On My Lips, Ann Curry's that is

Every morning I wake up to a cup of coffee and Ann Curry, she's half asian, half white and one of the anchors of Good Morning America. She's got my full attention when she's on TV, she's got that mouth and lips that I find very sexy,and ohh yeah she also does a very good job of delivering news.

Well this morning they showed her stand up comic debut and she was funny and did a great job. I think I cant be a stand up comic my asian accent will ruin the punch lines. I know one of the writers of Conan Obrien show and he's brilliant, he can make a joke on just about anything. I gave him some of my materials and almost all of them did not pass his taste, only one made it to Conan's monologue.

I like to tell jokes when I'm playing poker, these people are like my audience and most of the time they enjoy my jokes. I have this joke I made that never fails to make the table laugh, I tell this joke when there's an attractive lady playing. I would talk to the lady and say, "you look gorgeous you must have a lot of boyfriends" then follow it up with this, "I also have a lot of boyfriends and I tell you what it's a pain in the butt".

Well I'm not doing good playing online lately but I'm taking it like a man, like a ream man Chuck Norris, my main man, he's such a bad ass that the poker room floor manager calls him to settle poker hand dispute and Chuck normally settles it by just looking at these pinheads, they will just say, "ok its a split pot" and just scamper away like scared puppies. Anyway below are some of the video links of Ann Curry,

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Iy3LtJUQvik&feature=related

http://www.bestweekever.tv/2008/10/08/ann-currys-bringer-show-at-carolines/

Wednesday, October 8, 2008

Degenerate Zombies

Like I mentioned from my last blog, I played 3/6 Limit holdem at the Hawaiian Gardens Casino. Los Angeles is is one of the remaining mecca for LHE, this is where you can find 24 hrs of LHE and Commerce casino is the best here.

However LHE in Vegas is dying, gone are the days where the wait list for 15/30 at the Bellagio is more than an hour. Bellagio could not even get 8/16 going on a regular day and when its going its normally shorthanded.

Anyway, back to my homebase casino, Hawaiian Gardens, I look around and see familiar faces, they play a table, stand up scope other tables and request table change if needed. They walk like degenerate zombies constantly looking for fresh meat, I do the same thing once in while but most of the time I stick to my table and let other people move to other tables.

I also notice that there's some tight players here who doesn't like to play against me because they know I'm a three bettor. I sometimes limp UTG with hands like AQ offsuit on full ring games and if button/SB/BB raise then I would 3 bet especially if there's a lot of limpers between me and the raiser. This will not only build the pot but force some players in between to fold, these tight players they would just call with AQ offsuit and let the limpers come in too and then would get mad when their flopped Ace does not hold up.

When you are playing full ring game LHE, isolating players is very important, I can't stress this enough, when you are next to a bet, raise it if you have top pair or a pair with good draws, it doesn't matter if your kicker is low, this will force the next player to fold, now if next player or the initial bettor three bets then that's the time to look at the board and decide if you want to proceed to the turn, lesser the players involved the more chances of you winning the pot.

The stock market continuing to decline is getting me worried but I'm taking it like a man, like a real man Chuck Norris, my main man, he's such a bad ass that he only needs one card when playing Omaha.

Well that's it for now, I will put more poker related stuff on my next blog, I like to give a shoutout to all my homies at pokermanila.com, thanks to Mr.chokol8ce, Mr.Throws and other peeps for shipping me money on my stars account. You know what if my blog made you smile then send me some dinero, cents or dollars is appreciated, it's good for you and me, my Pokerstars id is "kobenator", thanks.

Tuesday, October 7, 2008

Wake up Sleepy Head

Last Saturday morning I woke up around 3am and could not sleep anymore, this stock market is bothering me so much, so the most logical thing to do as a poker addict is go look for action, so I went to Hawaiian Gardens Casino.

I like the half kill pot 4/8 LHE but no available seat, I looked at the 3/6 LHE and saw a vacant seat. I sat down and right away I saw this fellow Asian guy struggling to stay awake, we'll call him SH(sleepy head) for short, he is on my immediate left and on my right is the dealer.

So the dealer would just reach out and grab his cards when its his turn and not wake him up which is cool. Then comes the dealer change, the next dealer is short and small, so she would ask me to get the cards of SH and hand it to her.

After an orbit, there was this hand where everybody folded and it's the turn of SH, he is the SB and I'm the BB, I tried to get his cards but he woke up and momentarily grabbed my hands and yelled, "dont touch my cards", so I replied, "I'm sorry I thought you're asleep. He then raised the pot and said, "you pissed me off so I'm raising". I looked at my cards and its KQ offsuit so I called, I almost 3 bet, flop was A,7,4 rainbow, he bet and I folded my hands. He arrogantly showed his 8,2 offsuit, I felt humiliated but I was ok and plotted something but I'm not sure what it is.

Then after a couple of hands, he dozed off again, then a lightbulb lit up in my head. I looked at the Porter(these are people you can order drinks/coffee) and he's about 36 feet away from me, so I yelled as loud as I can, "PORTER". My loud voice woke SH up, he startled and tried to stand up but fell down on the ground, feeling embarassed he stood up right away, left and gave me a mean look. Table burst into laughter afer he left.

Well, Filipino Poker Tour 5 had just concluded and one of the members of Pokermanila took home 2nd place, his online name is 11finger. I'm sure he's disapppointed he didn't get the no.1 spot but I'm sure he's taking it like a man, like a real man Chuck Norris, my main man. If Manny Pacquaio is a pound for pound boxer, Chuck is the ton for ton fighter, Chuck will not even fight Oscar Dela Hoya coz he knows Oscar wears female lingerie.

Well that's it for now, I will put more poker related stuff on my next blog, I like to give a shoutout to all my homies at pokermanila.com, thanks to Mr.chokol8ce, Mr.Throws and other peeps for shipping me money on my stars account. You know what if my blog made you smile then send me some dinero, cents or dollars is appreciated, it's good for you and me, my Pokerstars id is "kobenator", thanks.

Friday, October 3, 2008

New York State of Mind

Last night I dreamt of New York again, no not the New York in the USA but New York St., Cubao, Quezon City Philippines. This is where I grew up and some of the streets are named after famous US cities like, Seattle St., Denver St., New York St. and so on and so forth.

I grew up poor but lucky enough to have relatives who gave me the support to finish college, my father is a womanizer and left my Mom when I was only 7 yrs. old. I remember when I was young, this kid was eating a big custard pie on a nearby bakery and the pie fell down on the ground while he's eating it. He didn't bother to pick it up to discard it onto the trash can but instead left hastily. When I saw that the pie was not that dirty I picked it up and ran home, gave most of it to my younger brother who did not waste any time to devour the whole thing. This is just one of the episodes of my life that I kept dreaming about.

A lot has happened to the Philippines but one thing remains, corruption in government is still rampant, there is so much money in Philippine government that even the most honest person will accept bribes and favors. Just like they say money is the root of all evil.

No limit Holdem Poker is gaining popularity in the Philippines, it used to be I could not find any poker room but now its everywhere. MetroCard Club is the only logical option or tournament poker, and for high stakes cash games, Hyatt Casino Manila is the only place to go.

One thing that pains me is that Limit Hold em is non-existent in the Philippines but I'm taking it like a man, like a real man Chuck Norris, my main man, he's such a bad azz that when he plays poker he brings in his card protector and its a human skull baby.

Well that's it for now, I will put more poker related stuff on my next blog, I like to give a shoutout to all my homies at http://www.pokermanila.com/, thanks to Mr.chokol8ce, Mr.Throw and other peeps for shipping me money on my stars account. You know what if my blog made you smile then send me some dinero, cents or dollars is appreciated, it's good for you and me, my Pokerstars id is "kobenator", thanks.

Thursday, October 2, 2008

Slow Rollin on the River

This is a late trip report, went to Vegas couple of months ago and checked in at the Imperial Palace then walked to Bellagio and placed my name on the list for 2-5 NLHE, lowest NLHE at Bellagio, was seated after 15 minutes.

Then something odd happened after an hour, this jerk slowrolled a poor old guy(POG), Villain flopped nut flush and POG flopped top 2 pairs, POG showed his cards and he thought he's good because villain did not open his hands right away. Villain took his time and act like he's beat then showed his nut flush and yelled, "Get that sh!t out of here Papa" then hysterically laughed by himself, we look at him like wtf. POG was stunned and looks like he's about to cry.

An old lady two spots from my left uttered, "that was rude young man", villain gave him a look like stfu.

Then Poker Gods decided to intervene, Villain miniraised in MP, both SB & BB(old lady) called,
flop AT2, two spades

Villain overbet the pot, SB folded, BB quietly called,
Villain said, "your flush is not coming" BB did not respond.

turn is an 8,

Villain said," I am not gonna let you get your flush, all in",
BB called and Villain showed his AT,

river is another T,

so board is AT28T, Villain pumped his fist and starts counting his chips, BB has more chips than the Villain.

BB/Old lady is taking her time, not showing her cards yet, then after a couple of minutes she said, "so u have a fullhouse" villain answered, "Yes I do and you need to put $500 more to the pot, I dont have all day, hurry up"

BB replied, "that wont be necessary young man I have a higher fullhouse", she showed her pocket Aces. Table was stunned.

Omg, I was not able to contain myself, I said, "Get that sh!t out of here", villain gave me a bad look that made me laugh even more, he left right away.

The next morning my hangover gave me so much problem, its painful but I took it like a man, like a real man Chuck Norris, my main man, he's such a bad azz that when he plays poker pot is always a kill pot coz that's all he knows, kill, kill, KILL, KILL.

Wednesday, October 1, 2008

Got dealt Pocket Aces Six times

I'm pissed again today, I looked at my 401k and its dwindling everyday, damn you stock market.

Anyway, on to the most important thing in my life and that's poker. I played a $6.50 45MTT at Pokerstars and got dealt Pocket Aces six times, that was weird, I normally dont get lucky that often. Let me give yall a rundown on what happened to those hands.

1st time I got Aces:won and doubled up.
2nd time:no action and got the blinds.
3rd time:won a small pot.
4th time:won again and propelled me as the massive chip leader.
5th time:won a good size pot and eliminated two players and down to the final 9 players.
6th time: final two players, me and the much bettter lucky guy, almost same chip stack. He went all in and I of course called with my Aces, he showed Pocket 6's, flop and turn was good for me but the river is a 6 and I lost.

One thing I'm learning about my self is that I need good cards to win, I dont have the poker skill and balls that I can pull out my azz when I'm on a tight situation. Getting rivered is painful but I took it like a man, like a real man Chuck Norris, my main man, he's so bad that when he plays poker he is always the big blind.

Well that's it for now, I will put more poker related stuff on my next blog, I like to give a shoutout to all my homies at www.Pokermanila.com, thanks to chokol8ce for shipping me money on my stars account. To prove that I got a second place from an MTT, you can check my stats, my Pokerstars id is kobenator, while you're at it, could youship me a couple of cents or dollars if you dont mind. You know what if my blog made you smile then send me some dinero, it's good for you and me.

Sunday, September 28, 2008

Danny chasing Danny

I'm so pissed again today, there was a couple of robberies in Las Vegas, one was at the Hilton sportsbook and the other one is at HArrah's main cage. I'm pissed because I've been thinking of robbing Las Vegas casinos for a while now, he he he, just kidding.

Anyway I heard from the grapevine that Danny Mccoy and the rest of Montecito gang are investigating this case, and one of their suspect is Danny Ocean and the seven dwarfs, we'll see what happen.

I'm thinking the Hilton robbery is an inside job, during that time Barry Manilow cut his concert short and I believe he sneaked into the Hilton sportsbook and stole the benjamins. Who would dare to challenge Mr. Manilow, if I'm the one guarding the sportsbook cage, I would just look the other way, you dont want to get him mad, what if he stop singing Copacobana? that will devastate everybody. The whole nation just adores Barry F@#kin Manilow.

This robberies are painful to me, but I'm taking it like a man, like a real man Chuck Norris, my main man. Chuck is so bad that he recently stole Barbie from Ken.

Thursday, September 25, 2008

Memories, Like the corners of my mind

Hello everyone, I'm not much of a blogger, my command of english is not that good, I studied on a tier 2 school in Manila Philippines, so please forgive my bad choice of grammar. I have another blog but its in Tagalog so I decided to open another one.

Let me start by telling you where I came from and where I'm at now. I was born and raised in Cubao, Quezon City Philippines, growing up I was exposed to gambling right away, mainly Madjong and Chinese poker. When I was 15 yrs old I visited a cousin in Olongapo City and that's where I learned how to play 7 card stud, I guessed it was beginners luck but I won $10 which was pretty big during that time.

When I graduated from college, I decided to follow my girlfriend in the USA because she promised to marry me and take care of me for the rest of my life. She was working at Commerce casino & hotel, everyday I would wait and pick her up and drive her back to her parents house, sometimes we would have sex inside my SUV while she's on break, goodtimes. That's where I also learned other poker games, mainly Hold em and Omaha.

My biggest bad beat came barreling down my way one day, my girlfriend met a rich Poker player and she was quick to abandon me. It was painful but I took it like a man, like a real man, Chuck Norris, my main man. Chuck is my inspiration, him and poker is a deadly combination, I'm a big fan of Chuck, in fact, I would drop a soap for Chuck, if you know what I mean.

Well that's it for now, I will put more poker related stuff on my next blog, I like to give a shoutout to all my homies at www.Pokermanila.com, thanks to chokol8ce for shipping me money on my stars account.