When was your heater?

we all have stories about how poker changed our lives,

in my case, the highlight of my poker career happened early 90's, i was visiting my cousin in Vegas and stayed there for 3 months, i had $4k in my pocket, i stepped into Mirage(used to have a lot of poker traffic), played 15/30 limit, and ran my money up to $12k. Then i figure why not try 30/60 at Bellagio, i was so hot hitting gutshots, and after 2 months of grinding my money got up to $60k.

Then went back to LA, spent some money on strip bars, lots of drinking, next thing i know my money is back down to 30k. So I went to Commerce casino, played 40/80, all 30k gone after 2 weeks, i could no longer hit anything, easy come easy go, that's when i realize i only got lucky, there is an old saying its "better lucky than good", but I found out the hard way that luck rans out but being good in poker will eventually get you to the promiseland.

At the moment, im playing limit games and low limit PLO and do not plan to play higher stakes, im done with that. One thing i learn from poker, even after playing for 25 years, I'm not good at it and im not ashame to admit it.

So Much Poker Not Enough Time!!!

For some odd reason I'm on a roll for the second month in a row, I'm not winning big but every session is a winning session, and i'm trying to push my luck by playing more than ever. Hitting flops, turns and rivers, my self-confidence is so high right now. My winnings is about $2400 just for this month, and this has created some problems.

First my wallet broke because of too much money bills, it's hard to fold and i had to put it in my front pocket instead of my back pocket, i will buy a new wallet this weekend, i dont want to deposit it in the bank due to my feng shui poker belief that you dont touch your money in your wallet unless you are spending it.

Second, I'm getting tempted to go up to $8/$16 LHE which i did in the past and the result were not good.

Third, I am delaying a lot of things in my life, like thorough cleaning of the house, visit to the Philippines, and playing basketball with buddies to name a few.

Fourth and last, my wife seems to think that i have a mistress, she's complaining that I dont bang her as much like I normally do, I told her to use the sex toys i gave her but she wants the real deal.

Too many things to do but not enough time, grrrrrrrrrr!!!!

Brick and Mortar Grind

After mourning the death of online poker, i had no other choice but to go back to Brick and Mortar place called Commerce Casino in Los Angeles. Although i've been winning lately, i still do not enjoy playing live anymore, for one, driving here in LA is such a pain. Then Casino takes so much rake that its hard to win big, biggest win i had one time is only $800 on a 10 hr session of $4/$8 Full kill Limit Holdem, if not for the rake, that would have easily reach a $1000. Also the smell of fellow poker players is unbearable, fart after fart, and the armpit sweat odor is the worse and sadly its happening here everyday due to summer weather.

Rough Month

$%$#%&W#^*&$@##$@@^&

I just cant win this month, both live and online, I decided to stop playing live and at FT, will just play micro games at PS.

Yesterday was the worse, I wanted to break my pc and my flat screen TV but opted to just punish my wife. Threw her on the bed and just slap her all over her body and gave her the roughest sex i could remember. She cried after the session, i said sorry but she said, "this is tears of joy honey, i didnt know u can be rough, i love it but next time tell me so i can buy more salonpas", wtf.

Legendary Pepe Smith

Pokermanila is the first pokersite that hit the Philippines and since then a couple of copycats have popped out. Well thank you to CEO Pepe Smith Pokermanila is still the no. 1 pokersite in the Philippines.

It took hard work though from Pepe, he improved the overall appearance of the site, used latest web technology and added a lot of cool stuff.

Well done Pepe and if there is ever a hall of fame for Pinoy Poker then you need to be inducted someday.

Lets give him a roaring round of applause.

Got Donkey Milk?

Asses’ milk or donkey’s milk is the milk given by the female ass or donkey. It has been used since Egyptian antiquity for both alimentary and cosmetic reasons.

Donkey milk is considered to be the closest to woman’s milk.[1][3] It is very nourishing because it contains more lactose and less fat than cow’s milk.[1] It was used until the beginning of the twentieth century as a substitute to breast milk.[5] The 1928 testimony of Dr. Charles Porcher (1872-1933) of the Lyon National Veterinary Institution showed that the practice was still used, to a lesser extent, in the interwar years:

It seems that we are getting back to asses’ milk to raise children in the earliest infancy, notably when the child is of delicate health. Asses’ milk has not been quite totally abandoned, but if 25 or 30 years ago, a few well looked-after asses were easily found in the city to provide milk nourishing young babies, it is no longer the case today.[6]
More recently, studies have shown that that asses’ milk could serve as an alternative to cow’s milk for children allergic to bovine proteins.[4][7]

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I think this milk will make me younger and good at Pokahhh, wooooohoooo, I just ordered 3 boxes online.

Rush Strategy

I just learned that I lose less when I play a max of two Rush tables, so I'll stick to that.

Fulltilt Achievement BAdges

Your Fulltilt avatar now has four badges around it, Everybody has a T on the bottom left corner but mine is F, and everytime i put the pointer on it, it says, "Fish, Fish, Fish, you are a Fish and we are letting everybody know".

F*ck You Fulltilt! !!!

Peter Eastgate Won 9 Million and Quitting Poker

If i win 9 million, i will continue playing at a micro level in Manila or Thailand, i will grind the 10 NL and smile everytime i get bad beat, probably visit Metro Card Club once a month.

My other passion is french vanilla ice cream, better than sex baby, f*ck hot women, i dont need them, I wont even visit the massage parlors to get a quickie, I dont enjoy sex at all and I have reluctantly f*ck so many hot women in the past.

Ready to Quit

For the past two months, my online bankroll just went down the drain, I keep losing left and right, no matter what I play, mtt's, sng's, cash games, holdem, 7 card stud, omaha, you name it.

Grrrrrrrrrrr, I'm thinking online poker is just a waste of time, On the other hand, I'm winning so far on live Limit cash games.

Don't tell me to read books coz I read all the books, Harrington, Brunson, Pearjammer, David Pham(even thought it's in Vienamese), I even read Liebert's cook books hoping I'll find something there.

I tried to sell my soul to the Devil but he declined coz my soul apparently smells like fish.

M - Ratio is one of my leaks

M-ratio

In no-limit or pot-limit poker, a player's M-ratio (also called "M number", "M factor"[1] or just "M") is a measure of the health of his chip stack as a function of the cost to play each round. In simple terms, a player can sit passively in the game, making only compulsory bets, for M laps of the dealer button before running out of chips. A high M means the player can afford to wait a number of rounds before making a move. The concept applies primarily in tournament poker; in a cash game, a player can in principle manipulate his M at will, simply by purchasing more chips.
A player with a low M must act soon or be weakened by the inability to force other players to fold with aggressive raises.

The term was invented and named by Paul Magriel.

Men "The Master" Nguyen

Last night I pee'd next to Men, I purposely look at his dingdong but could not see a damn thing, its too short, all i see is a steady stream of urine, he finally notice me and gave me that angry look and he said,

Men:Wat u lookin at?

NArdong Putik:who me?, uhh (I could not think of anything to say until this come out)

Nardong Putik: oohh I'm missing some tournament chips, I'm just making sure you are not hiding it down there.

Men:$#^#^&*@$##!@#%$

Patrik Antonius

Im next in line for a Taxi at Mcarran Airport while PAtrik Antonius is at the back of the line, I looked at him and for some reason he posed like he does when you open your Fulltilt lobby and that did it, I told him I'll share a Taxi with him, damn this guy is goodlooking but I was able to contain myself. He made me hold his...............mirror while he looks at himself the entire trip to Bellagio, goodtimes.

And he was kind enough to make me pay for the cab fare.

Poker is All Luck

Texas Hold'em is not a skill game, says Swiss high court 02.06.2010 15:17

Swiss high court has deemed Texas Hold'em a game of chance in a recent decision. This means that only casinos are allowed to hold poker tournaments for money in the country.

Texas Hold'em tournaments in restaurants and hotels have been popular but the Swiss casinos demanded the sole right to organize these tournaments. According to the Finnish newspaper Helsingin Sanomat, the High Court in Switzerland took the side of the casinos, saying that luck was the dominant factor in the game instead of strategy, psychology or mathematics.

However, the Swiss are still allowed to hold home games for money.

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Damn, no wonder i dont win, all this time I thought my time would come because I've been honing my poker skill, and now finally I seen the light, I'm just not lucky.

I'm sure somebody would tell the Swiss to just keep making chocolate and watches and stfu, lol.

No more money in Poker, Everybody is Lucky

Down Swingers

Downswings are not fun, i hope i recover, my fulltilt money is almost gone, wahhhhh!!!.

Addicted to Ms. Rush

Wow Im so addicted to this new poker craze Rush Poker its not even funny, I cant seem to clean the house and the wife is giving me all kinds of nagging. I wonder if i should check my self into rehab or just dump the wife, lol.

Im not even good at it and my br went down to $30 but I used my $26 ticket and was able to win a cool $108 on a matrix sng, so now Im up to around $138, I will continue to grind until money is all gone or maybe Fulltilt rakeback will save me and let me continue with my addiction. We shall see, as the song goes, "I'm addicted to you babe, you're a hard habit to break...."

You are playing too much when...Part III

When taking a big dump and constipating, you keep shouting, "one time dealer one time".

When u call your fat girlfriend, massive chip leader

Queen of Rush Poker

Every morning for the past two weeks, I see Ms. Soraya Homam, she is fulltilt pro, she plays 25 NL/50NL Rush Poker and she is the first Iranian woman I know who plays poker. She took my money AA>KK but somehow I dont feel bad, she is very tight and only one table 25NL and 50 NL.

Feel free to share if you have seen other pros playing Rush Poker.

You are playing too much when...Part II

when ur ideal MILF's are KAthy Liebert and Linda Johnson, lol.

Straight Flush and Quads on the same Minute

Full Tilt Poker Game - Table Apollo - $0.10/$0.25 - No Limit Hold'em - 1:24:03 ET - 2010/04/08

Seat 1: BH-Stoneface ($32.59)

Seat 2: FRANKENKING ($12.25)

Seat 3: riverbegood1 ($10.55)

Seat 4: IYFF ($45.34)

Seat 5: Hero ($18)

Seat 6: LordofTheRing ($28.96)

Seat 7: SavagePenguin ($41.06)

Seat 8: Yusuf89 ($31.56)

Seat 9: lbbarcelos ($38.80)

FRANKENKING posts the small blind of $0.10

riverbegood1 posts the big blind of $0.25

The button is in seat #1 *** HOLE CARDS ***

Dealt to Hero [Qh Kh]

IYFF has 8 seconds left to act IYFF folds

Hero has 8 seconds left to act Hero calls $0.25

LordofTheRing calls $0.25

SavagePenguin folds

Yusuf89 folds

lbbarcelos has 8 seconds left to act

lbbarcelos raises to $1.25

BH-Stoneface folds

FRANKENKING folds

riverbegood1 folds

Hero calls $1

LordofTheRing calls $1

*** FLOP *** [Ts Jh Th]

Hero checks

LordofTheRing checks

lbbarcelos checks

*** TURN *** [Ts Jh Th] [8d]

Hero checks

LordofTheRing checks

lbbarcelos bets $2 Hero calls $2

LordofTheRing folds

*** RIVER *** [Ts Jh Th 8d] [9h]

Hero has 15 seconds left to act Hero bets $4.75

lbbarcelos has 15 seconds left to act

lbbarcelos calls $4.75

*** SHOW DOWN ***

Hero shows [Qh Kh] a straight flush, King high

lbbarcelos mucks

Hero wins the pot ($16.72) with a straight flush, King high

*** SUMMARY ***

Total pot $17.60 Rake $0.88 Board: [Ts Jh Th 8d 9h]

Seat 1: BH-Stoneface (button) didn't bet (folded)

Seat 2: FRANKENKING (small blind) folded before the Flop

Seat 3: riverbegood1 (big blind) folded before the Flop

Seat 4: IYFF didn't bet (folded)

Seat 5: Hero showed [Qh Kh] and won ($16.72) with a straight flush, King

high

Seat 6: LordofTheRing folded on the Turn

Seat 7: SavagePenguin didn't bet (folded)

Seat 8: Yusuf89 didn't bet (folded)

Seat 9: lbbarcelos mucked [Jd Ac] - two pair, Jacks and Tens

Full Tilt Poker Game - Table Apollo - $0.10/$0.25 - No Limit Hold'em - 1:24:42 ET - 2010/04/08 Seat

1: Hero ($18)

Seat 2: Kukubumunuluku ($24.75)

Seat 3: pinkyfloyd81 ($62.93)

Seat 4: Stars Master ($21.33)

Seat 5: BudWiseUp ($31.67)

Seat 6: 2Uber ($31.79)

Seat 7: brandon1717 ($25)

Seat 8: Stork E ($25)

Seat 9: aaronbeq ($14.62)

2Uber posts the small blind of $0.10

brandon1717 posts the big blind of $0.25

The button is in seat #5

*** HOLE CARDS ***

Dealt to Hero [4s 4c]

Stork E folds aaronbeq folds

Hero calls $0.25

Kukubumunuluku folds

pinkyfloyd81 folds

Stars Master folds

BudWiseUp folds

2Uber raises to $1

brandon1717 calls $0.75

Hero calls $0.75

*** FLOP *** [4h 4d 3h]

2Uber bets $2.50

brandon1717 folds

Hero calls $2.50

*** TURN *** [4h 4d 3h] [Qc]

2Uber bets $7.25 Hero has 15 seconds left to act

Hero calls $7.25

*** RIVER *** [4h 4d 3h Qc] [Th]

2Uber checks

Hero bets $7.25, and is all in

2Uber calls $7.25

*** SHOW DOWN ***

Hero shows [4s 4c] four of a kind,

Fours 2Uber mucks

Hero wins the pot ($35.15) with four of a kind, Fours

*** SUMMARY *** Total pot $37 Rake $1.85

Board: [4h 4d 3h Qc Th]

Seat 1: Hero showed [4s 4c] and won ($35.15) with four of a kind, Fours

Seat 2: Kukubumunuluku didn't bet (folded)

Seat 3: pinkyfloyd81 didn't bet (folded)

Seat 4: Stars Master didn't bet (folded)

Seat 5: BudWiseUp (button) didn't bet (folded)

Seat 6: 2Uber (small blind) mucked [Jh Qd] - two pair, Queens and Fours

Seat 7: brandon1717 (big blind) folded on the Flop

Seat 8: Stork E didn't bet (folded)

Seat 9: aaronbeq didn't bet (folded)